Emirates website = the epitome of evil

Finally booked and paid for flights to New Zealand on the weekend. Let me rephrase that. NB booked and paid for his flight on his pc while I was trying to do the same on mine. A million freaking attempts later, still no ticket. Usually I am pretty cool, calm and collected dealing with shite computer systems but I tell you, the Emirates online booking system takes the cake. Never in my days have I come across something so terribly inept. I am embarassed to say this, but it reduced me to tears. Why could he book his tickets and not me? Let me just walk you through the process so you too can feel my pain:

1. Logon to the Emirates site. All excited, ready to book my ticket. My details are in fields that cannot be edited. So my ticket will be in my maiden name. No biggie I think to myself. System lets me proceed. When it comes to confirming final flight, I get an error that states “incorrect short use of middle name”. WTF? My middle name is coming from your system and I cannot edit the field so how the fricking hell can I do anything about this?
   
2. Call helpdesk and girl modifies my middle name to be the correct name rather than just the initial. Go figure.
   
3. Start again. Proceed with booking flight, all name details correct. Transaction hangs in the middle of process. Goody for me, the system has already taken my frequent flyer points and I have not realised. So, I have a tiny amount of points left to my name and no flight. Let’s start again shall we?
4. Start again. Error. You do not have any points to book a flight today. You bastard system!
5. Ring helpdesk again. Points reissued. All is good in the world again.
6. Go to the "Itineraries" section of the site which has recorded my attempts at making this booking. I try and be smart and think that I will reactivate one of these previous bookings, rather than starting from scratch. The site says I can do this. I cannot. All I can do is view or delete a previous booking. I cannot edit it and proceed, even though the instructions say there is an edit button.
   
7. Start again. Get through to the end, ready to pay. My credit card has to go through the new “Verified by Visa” process. I start to get nervous. This Visa process has cocked me over in the past. True to form, top points for consistency. My transaction is rejected and I am told to contact my bank.
8. Ring bank. Am told I need to type my name exactly as it appears on my card. For example “Mrs Penelope Jane Bloggs”. I advised that I was doing this. I was then told that the name field is case sensitive, though nothing of this nature is stated on the Visa site. What they mean when they say “type exactly as what appears on your card” means type your name in capitals. Jesus, Mary & Joseph! I am surprised that I am not bashing my head against the monitor by this stage.
9. Start again. Get through Visa process. Reverted back to Emirates site. Error. You cannot book flight.
10. Ring helpdesk again. Advised that I cannot book flight because my passport name is in my married name but my frequent flyer membership is in my maiden name. I am advised that I can book the tickets online, but I cannot purchase them. I must go to the Emirates office in the city to do this. When I say purchase, all I have to do is pay the freaking airport taxes. These are frequent flyer tickets.
11. Start again. Try and book tickets and advise that I will be collecting them in person. Am informed that I must do this within 5 working days. System fails me again.
12. Ring helpdesk again. Advised to delete cookies. Why didn't I think of that?
13. Start again. Ticket booked. I am a blubbering mess.
    

Ok, this post is getting a bit long and my blood is starting to boil recollecting it all, so I will save the joy of visiting the Emirates office for another instalment.

Congratulations to my favourite Irish workmate who became a granny this weekend. Am told that little Ava-May is a dote. Favourite Scottish workmate, favourite Irish workmate and I went out for lunch today to celebrate.